(Source: staypozitive, via wakingupinparis)
19
pacific northwest
cat obsessed
not really into much of anything • hi kids. do you like violence?
go forth and die
Hearing that everyone prefers Lindsay over me is really harsh. I fucking broke down tonight and I’m still not feeling normal. Its harsh realizing how fucked up I really am. I hate that laine and Caleb heard me cry but I couldn’t hold it in anymore. I like to think I’m a good person but maybe I’m really not. This weekend had made me feel so good but now I don’t know what’s going on.
I know I shouldn’t sleep with Ben anymore. Especially since he told me that he’d rather have sex with Lindsay. But its so hard to let go of someone that I really loved. The more that time passes the more I realize that I really did love him.
Its hard to breathe. I feel like the weight of the world is crushing me. I need a few mental health days. I can’t keep pretending that stuff doesn’t get to me. Someone help me. I’m exhausted.
“I want you. I want your sleepy confused look when you wake up. I want to be the warmth that fills the space in your bed. I want to be the sheets your fingers crave at night; the blanket that wraps around you all night. I want to drink tea with you, share some records we find. I want to talk about everything in the world newspapers. I want to discuss with you, to be stubborn and quick-witted with you. I want to have differences between us. I want your flaws. All of them. I want to go into the deepest corners of your mind and never get bored of you. I want to be surprised by the new all the time. I want to look at you like a movie, a living piece of art; always trying to chase what you crave … and capture you.”
— Elay Neal Moses (via perfect)
(Source: wordsthat-speak, via rachel-k)
